This morning I should have really thought about my upcoming day a bit more....
Went to Court and had to have them search my bag (obviously). Sort of forgot to remove;
- the 5m of red ribbon;
- the various ladybird related haberdashery that I've been carrying around for a week;
- the empty boxes of Marlboros; and
- the 3 spare lighters.
I could go on because I have a fuck load of crap in my handbag but they are most definitely the most random.
As if that wasn't bad enough I put on a different jacket to the one I normally wear. Forgot to remove it before I went before the Judge, sat down, looked at my lapel and saw an offensive badge that says, "Damaged Goods", on it. Great. (By way of explanation, it was a 'gift'. Although I always thought gifts were meant to be nice things)
It wasn't all bad though. I remembered this conversation from when I was in Brighton,
Person 1: I need to get laid
Person 2: I bet it's been longer for me than it has for you. I'm basically asexual now. When I'm horny I watch the Care Bears
Cue much rolling around in laughter from everyone present interspersed with people saying ouch because we were on the pebbley beach.
I've also decided to sack this London thing off and move to Momiji Land. It looks dead nice there. Everyone is really friendly and I hear real estate is going quite cheap at the moment.