❤ We went to a wedding in Whitstable and when we got there it was not very sunny but very windy. And I sat on the beach all day drinking beer whilst the boys painted a wall. Then we got in and realised that we looked like Rudolph the Red Faced Reindeer. Luckily I had foundation. Unluckily MonsieurB did not.
❤ Then it was the wedding and we sat on the beach with ghetto-blasters, cham-pag-ne, shot glasses, pretend blowjobs, stones, tears, cake tables, buffets, beach huts and dance offs. Then we all danced to on a ragga tip in our pretty dresses. Then Right Said Fred turned up and took all the glory. Those too sexy bastards.
❤ Then we sat at the beach hut all day drinking bucks fizz. Then we buried a man. Then someone put their bum on the man's head. Then we locked the man under the beach hut. And then the man kicked his way out. It sounds like we don't love the man but I think everyone loves the man. Then everyone went for food and we carried on drinking. Then we stopped for an oyster. Then we went to the pub and had lots of shots whilst all the girls screamed about horses and all the boys shook their heads in horror and admiration. Then MonsieurB made us all drink rum. I hate rum apart from the bit where I pretend I'm a pirate. Then I remember I'm not a pirate and fear I'm going to puke. And I could only be placated by a snickers. And maybe a punch in the head
❤ Then we had more beach hut fun but with fish and chip based fun. And then we went home. And I was sad. So I flew the Flag of Fun. Using a pair of expensive tights out of a car door.
❤ (I smoked *gasp*)