Tuesday, October 28, 2008


It's possible that it may have escaped your notice but something really important is going on right now. And if you have the ability to vote then you should use it. Seriously. Because your vote could make all the difference between a Leona and a Leon. Yes. That's right people. I'm talking about X Factor.

I feel compelled to comment upon this weekend's episode (No, I didn't watch it on Saturday night. Yes, I was enough of a loser to watch it after it had been broadcast). Daniel. Please. Someone give him a t shirt that says, "My wife is dead", and then let him stand mute for 3 minutes on stage until it's time for the judges to say their usual spiel about how that performance might just be the best in The Competition and that they've changed their mind about the contestant or that they have the next Leona Lewis on stage in front of them etc etc etc. If there ever was a man on the edge then he is it. If the judges had any compassion they'd boot him off and put him in the Priory for what is clearly insanity brought on from grief.

I'd also like to take the time to point out that if anything epic ever happens to my entire family (the Jennifer Hudson saga will do. She'd be hauled on to X Factor if she hadn't already been on American Idol) then I'm gonna present my arse to Simon Cowell on a plate in exchange for a couple of million. I know for a fact I'd only be famous for about a week before I'd be forgotten about. Suits me down to the ground. I could handle being followed for a week in exchange for silly cash.

Anyway. Enough. I'm off to watch some proper television. That's right. Twiggy's frock swap.

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